Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
