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i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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