needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
