Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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