How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
