youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
i think my cat just said my name.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
