Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
My vagina just recognized that song.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
