Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
