Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
