32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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