I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
She needs sedatives and a leash
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
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