Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Randomize
