He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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