Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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