bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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