people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
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