Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Randomize
