I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
