You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
