You were right. It hurts to walk today.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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