Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize