I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
