I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
