can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
