I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
