You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
