I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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