New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
