Taylor Swift is so right about you.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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