so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
