piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
