it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
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