I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Randomize
