Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
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