you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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