They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize