your thong is hanging out like whoa
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize