i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
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