so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
My vagina just recognized that song.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
