Why are handjobs necessary in class?
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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