on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Say something about gay babies.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
