Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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