How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
