this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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