He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
