So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
