it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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