The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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