I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Omg I joined a choir last night...
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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