I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize