She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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