: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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